I straddle the fence between ‘normality’ and ‘spirituality’, acutely aware that every person can benefit from an amount of spiritual awareness to bring a broader meaning to the toil of being human and every guru can benefit from a few everyday commitments to ground them down from woo-woo land.
I was born Teena Heaven, the child of a working class father and a strong, straight-talking mother. I am female and don’t have any memory of ever being anything else.
I was born on a full moon when she was in Taurus and the sun was in Scorpio. I have more Martian and Plutonic energy in me than I care to admit to, saved only by my Libran Venus and my Sagittarian ascendant.
I have five older brothers and sisters, and was bullied and protected, nurtured and ridiculed in equal measures. But I was always loved. Academically brighter than average, I was lazily sent to secondary school a year early, where I sat in the background avoiding the attention of my older and more attractive peers. I graduated without ambition and stumbled my way into art college, out of which I dropped with the same level of ambition two years later.
I lied my punk-persona-Art-college-dropout way into a typing job and spent the next two years generally doing what all twenty-something year olds should do – having fun.
I married young and had three female children. My husband and I built businesses and houses, managed to feed and grow our free-spirited children and just about managed to get them to and from school on time. We worked hard amidst our harmonious if somewhat unusual and frenetic family lifestyle. At the critical age of 42 I realised that I couldn’t go on lurching between exhaustion and a wine bottle, and so for the sake of his sanity and my own I left.
And I grew up. At last.
Alone but never lonely I shoehorned our children into my tiny new home, added some hobbies and a few pets to keep our minds from straying back to the past, and studied Chinese medicine just in case my business failed to thrive.
Quite miraculously, my husband found himself a lovely new wife who has made him happy, my children grew into beautiful, caring, intelligent and responsible adults, my business thrived, and my Chinese medicine studies opened doors to a world of spiritual awareness more wondrous than I could ever have imagined.
In 2012 I met someone who changed my life, or rather my perception of the place that “Teena” holds within it. Her name was Sarah.
Through Sarah I started walking. Through walking I found clarity. From a place of clarity I am able to operate happily and successfully in the modern commercial world whilst understanding that money really is not the only currency we have, nor the only path to heaven.
At the time of writing this I am 58, and am approaching my second Saturn return with few regrets, fewer empty wine bottles left on the kitchen table at night, a home full of dogs, a scrapbook full of glory days and an attitude of gratitude.